Since most goat owners will insist on seeing blood test results for your goat before breeding, we went ahead and had blood samples drawn and sent away for testing. When a goat is less than a year old, its immune system is still developing, so false results can be common, but this was a chance we needed to take if we wanted to go ahead and breed them. We honestly didn't expect any problems.
It took several weeks to hear anything from our vet, and when we did, we were accidentally told by the vet's assistant the wrong result on one test, which was that one of our goats (Moe) was positive for CAE. CAE is a terrible autoimmune disease I couldn't believe this result, considering the fact that we were told by the previous owners that the herd was both CAE and CL negative. This result was told to us by accident, and was cleared up later, but I had to wait for the entire week of Christmas vacation until the office was open again and I could talk to our vet before the situation was clarified. We were also told that our other goat, Coco, tested positive for a disease called Johne's disease. This was verified by the vet as an accurate test result when we talked to her again. I knew little about Johne's disease and began researching it. It's possible to get false positive results, especially on young goats, so we had the goats tested again. And once again, we had to wait a while for the results. This time, Moe tested negative for everything and Coco tested positive again for Johne's.
I've researched everything I can on this disease, and I can say that the outcome of an animal with it is not pretty. It is a wasting disease that inevitably kills the animal with the disease. The fact that Coco tested positive twice meant that somehow, she had been exposed to this parasite. She seemed perfectly healthy. We could have taken a chance and hoped that she would never develop the actual sickness, but it's a risky chance to take. Animals with this disease begin shedding the parasite in their feces while they are still healthy. This makes them extremely dangerous because they are contagious to other animals that come in contact with their feces, even if they don't appear to be sick. There is no cure for Johne's disease.
Our next step was to test her feces for evidence of the parasite. Once again, we waited. Eventually, the results came back negative. This was a relief because it meant that she was not shedding the parasite in her feces, and therefore not contagious to her sister. So here were our choices: Do we keep her, knowing that she could be healthy for the rest of her life, or get rid of her, knowing that she could be sick and contagious to other animals?
It was a tough decision. I've grown attached to both of my goats, but especially Coco. She's the sweet one who loves being pet. Her sister is more skittish, but will follow Coco's lead.
![]() |
| Me and Coco |
It is important to me that I understand where my food comes from. Most of the animals we eat have been raised in stressful, unsanitary conditions. Cows are fed corn and other grains instead of being allowed to graze, which creates all sorts of health conditions. Consider the obesity epidemic in our country and realize that cows have their own version of it. Usually, when you buy beef from the grocery store (that is specifically labeled as "grass-fed"), you are eating obese animals that were likely sick and wouldn't have lived very long before slaughter. Chickens are housed in such crowded conditions that they begin to peck at each other and seriously injure each other due to stress. Therefore, their beaks are cut off to prevent this. This is a terribly cruel and painful thing to do in order to save a little bit of money and sell cheap meat. I could go on and on about our current food industry and how the animals are usually treated. It's pretty terrible stuff, but I don't think the answer is becoming a vegetarian. Many of our modern farming practices cause just as much destruction and unneeded pain to animals in the environment indirectly, through the destruction of habitat, the effects of monoculture on the local ecosystem, and other farming practices that directly or indirectly cause harm to animals. I understand why many people have chosen to become vegetarians and vegans for moral reasons, but I have come to understand that the real reason we are mistreating animals is because of our new dependency on foods from large industries with unsustainable practices.
This dependency partially results from the relatively recent phenomenon of being able to buy pretty much any food item we want at any time of the year. Want tropical fruit in January? No problem. Just ship it from the tropics. Mid-summer veggies shipped come all the way from South America in the middle of the winter. Right now, I've been buying berries from Mexico. I am part of the problem because I love these foods and therefore support the industries by continuing to buy them. But this is for a different rant. It is related to my story here, but only in that it demonstrates my frustration with our current food system and my need to address it in some way.
What I've been contemplating lately is the harvesting process. I use the word "harvest" for not only plants, but our animals as well. In addition to the fish we raise in our aquaponics systems, we also raise chickens (for eggs), goats (for milk), and rabbits (for meat). As I mentioned earlier, I think it is important to be producing my own food and I think it is just as important for animals to be treated humanely and compassionately. When Brian first mentioned raising rabbits for food, I was uncomfortable with this. It's one thing to harvest fish, with their scaly bodies and buggy eyes, but rabbits are adorable and fuzzy. Many people own rabbits as pets. How on earth do you harvest something that is so cute? What I have come to realize, however, is that my relationship with our rabbits makes it easier in some ways to know that they are going to become food. Rabbits in the wild will most likely die a much more painful death than our rabbits. Neither will live very long lives, as our pets tend to do, but that is just the way it goes. Instead of eating chickens that had their beaks cut off so that they could be raised in inhumane conditions, I am eating rabbits that were cuddled almost every day, fed healthy food, and given enough space to move around (and occasionally come out of their cages to run free for a while). I have reached a peace with this now and strive to continue providing compassionate conditions for these animals that will end up sustaining me. Brian has done all of the harvesting so far, but I intend to learn how to do it myself soon.
Now back to our goat situation. Given her blood results and the chance that she could develop an infectious disease in the coming years, despite how healthy she was right now, we realized that the best choice would be to cull her. "Culling" is another term I have had to become acquainted with. It is used to describe what livestock owners do with sick, weak, or otherwise undesirable animals in their herds. Even though she could very well have lived a long, healthy life, the risk that she presented to Moe (her sister) and any other goats we may end up with in the future was too great to leave to chance. After much more research, I discovered that eating meat from an animal exposed to Johne's disease is safe, so we decided to harvest Coco.
Despite my opinions on meat harvesting, I had no intention of eating either of our goats any time soon. We purchased them when they were only a few months old and intended on using them for milk production. I assumed I had at least a few years with both of these gals... some goats can produce milk for up to 7 years or longer. I think I knew that, at some point in time, these animals would become food, but I also thought I would have plenty of time to spend with them before this event occurred. And did I mention that Coco is really cute? There's the cuteness factor again. I truly understand why many people keep goats as pets.
Our goats, however, were not pets. We made the decision and needed to follow through with it... but I couldn't do it. Not this time. Not with her. Luckily, our neighbors came to help Brian with the process and to provide me some emotional support. They recently harvested one of their own goats, and understood the emotional aspect of the process. They brought their goat to be harvested at a butcher, however, and we were doing the deed ourselves.
I feel the need to address something now. I know the thought of killing and processing an animal is horrifying to some people. Even certain people that I love and respect dearly seemed to be shocked or dismayed when I explained what we did. I hope that my rants above explain why it was important to us to do this, even if you don't agree with it. I hope that, before judging our actions, you can take an opportunity to examine your own choices and what effect they might have, even indirectly, on the lives of others. It might feel better to purchase your meat from a store after all the dirty work has been done out of sight, or to purchase your meat substitutes without knowing the true effects that those plants may have on the ecosystems they were grown in. All of our choices have some sort of effect on others. I am simply trying to have more control on those effects.
Brian and I both spent hours researching how to do this humanely. We cared for this goat and did not want her to experience hurt or fear on our behalf. As I mentioned before, I couldn't bring myself to participate in this one. I just wasn't prepared for it yet. Brian did his best with help from the neighbors while I did a thorough cleaning of the goat pen. Both Brian and I shed tears over Coco. We miss her, but we are also thankful for her sacrifice. While I am on the topic of being thankful, I can't express how thankful I am that Brian was strong enough to do this, even though he was dealing with his own emotions. I've learned so much from him and plan to take a larger role in this process the next time we have to do it. I now understand how to be more emotionally prepared. I am also incredibly grateful for all of the support I have received from my neighbors and other "goat mentors" through this process. I think we all walked away learning some valuable lessons.
Once the processing reached a point in which she no longer resembled the goat that I could recognize as Coco, I was able to help with the rest. We spent another day cleaning, cutting, and processing meat into packages that could be frozen. I also cooked a LOT of goat meat in a few different ways and froze some of the food for later.
Those that are around me often may have notice that I've been introspective and kept to myself a little more lately. These are the reasons why. This has been quite a learning experience and I have been intent on growing from it. The only way to accomplish our goals is to learn from our experiences.
Last night, our dinner was goat-meat tacos. I said a little prayer of thanks to Coco and then enjoyed my meal guilt free.
This dependency partially results from the relatively recent phenomenon of being able to buy pretty much any food item we want at any time of the year. Want tropical fruit in January? No problem. Just ship it from the tropics. Mid-summer veggies shipped come all the way from South America in the middle of the winter. Right now, I've been buying berries from Mexico. I am part of the problem because I love these foods and therefore support the industries by continuing to buy them. But this is for a different rant. It is related to my story here, but only in that it demonstrates my frustration with our current food system and my need to address it in some way.
What I've been contemplating lately is the harvesting process. I use the word "harvest" for not only plants, but our animals as well. In addition to the fish we raise in our aquaponics systems, we also raise chickens (for eggs), goats (for milk), and rabbits (for meat). As I mentioned earlier, I think it is important to be producing my own food and I think it is just as important for animals to be treated humanely and compassionately. When Brian first mentioned raising rabbits for food, I was uncomfortable with this. It's one thing to harvest fish, with their scaly bodies and buggy eyes, but rabbits are adorable and fuzzy. Many people own rabbits as pets. How on earth do you harvest something that is so cute? What I have come to realize, however, is that my relationship with our rabbits makes it easier in some ways to know that they are going to become food. Rabbits in the wild will most likely die a much more painful death than our rabbits. Neither will live very long lives, as our pets tend to do, but that is just the way it goes. Instead of eating chickens that had their beaks cut off so that they could be raised in inhumane conditions, I am eating rabbits that were cuddled almost every day, fed healthy food, and given enough space to move around (and occasionally come out of their cages to run free for a while). I have reached a peace with this now and strive to continue providing compassionate conditions for these animals that will end up sustaining me. Brian has done all of the harvesting so far, but I intend to learn how to do it myself soon.
Now back to our goat situation. Given her blood results and the chance that she could develop an infectious disease in the coming years, despite how healthy she was right now, we realized that the best choice would be to cull her. "Culling" is another term I have had to become acquainted with. It is used to describe what livestock owners do with sick, weak, or otherwise undesirable animals in their herds. Even though she could very well have lived a long, healthy life, the risk that she presented to Moe (her sister) and any other goats we may end up with in the future was too great to leave to chance. After much more research, I discovered that eating meat from an animal exposed to Johne's disease is safe, so we decided to harvest Coco.
Despite my opinions on meat harvesting, I had no intention of eating either of our goats any time soon. We purchased them when they were only a few months old and intended on using them for milk production. I assumed I had at least a few years with both of these gals... some goats can produce milk for up to 7 years or longer. I think I knew that, at some point in time, these animals would become food, but I also thought I would have plenty of time to spend with them before this event occurred. And did I mention that Coco is really cute? There's the cuteness factor again. I truly understand why many people keep goats as pets.
![]() |
| Coco looking cute when we first bought her |
I feel the need to address something now. I know the thought of killing and processing an animal is horrifying to some people. Even certain people that I love and respect dearly seemed to be shocked or dismayed when I explained what we did. I hope that my rants above explain why it was important to us to do this, even if you don't agree with it. I hope that, before judging our actions, you can take an opportunity to examine your own choices and what effect they might have, even indirectly, on the lives of others. It might feel better to purchase your meat from a store after all the dirty work has been done out of sight, or to purchase your meat substitutes without knowing the true effects that those plants may have on the ecosystems they were grown in. All of our choices have some sort of effect on others. I am simply trying to have more control on those effects.
Brian and I both spent hours researching how to do this humanely. We cared for this goat and did not want her to experience hurt or fear on our behalf. As I mentioned before, I couldn't bring myself to participate in this one. I just wasn't prepared for it yet. Brian did his best with help from the neighbors while I did a thorough cleaning of the goat pen. Both Brian and I shed tears over Coco. We miss her, but we are also thankful for her sacrifice. While I am on the topic of being thankful, I can't express how thankful I am that Brian was strong enough to do this, even though he was dealing with his own emotions. I've learned so much from him and plan to take a larger role in this process the next time we have to do it. I now understand how to be more emotionally prepared. I am also incredibly grateful for all of the support I have received from my neighbors and other "goat mentors" through this process. I think we all walked away learning some valuable lessons.
Once the processing reached a point in which she no longer resembled the goat that I could recognize as Coco, I was able to help with the rest. We spent another day cleaning, cutting, and processing meat into packages that could be frozen. I also cooked a LOT of goat meat in a few different ways and froze some of the food for later.
Those that are around me often may have notice that I've been introspective and kept to myself a little more lately. These are the reasons why. This has been quite a learning experience and I have been intent on growing from it. The only way to accomplish our goals is to learn from our experiences.
Last night, our dinner was goat-meat tacos. I said a little prayer of thanks to Coco and then enjoyed my meal guilt free.

















